How interesting! I took the test and, no surprise to me, I’m “Words of Affirmation”. That has been my language since I was a child. My husband took it and his is “Physical Touch”. What’s interesting is that I thought his would be Words of Affirmation. I’m always complimenting him on all tasks he does around the house, his work, his appearance, etc. I seemed to have been under the misconception that this was his love language since it was mine. Now I know! Much more snuggling coming his way lol. Thanks for a very interesting piece this morning, Matthew!
Tami - glad you enjoyed it and glad you guys took the test. It is interesting how we often assume someone else's love language due to our own bias. It made such a difference in my marriage after we figured out how to communicate love to one another in a way that the recipient understood!
Matthew, this was great, and it sparked an engaging conversation between my wife and me. We enjoyed talking about which of the love languages we each appreciate the most. Thanks for this!
Don, thanks for the kind words. This book and topic have been a really great conversation piece for my wife and me as well over the years. It has helped us both during some challenging moments when it seemed like communication wasn't going well and then we realized that one or both of us were off on a tangent somewhere!
Thanks so much for mentioning my publication in a post titled by ZNH! ❤️ I also love the coffee analogy and may share this with my husband with hopes of 5 kinds of coffee this week - literally.
Interesting and timely reflections here. Always enjoy your work, Matthew.
I sincerely appreciate the kind words. My wife isn't a coffee drinker, so I am not sure this will resonate quite the same with her, but one can always hope!
Thank you for sharing this, Matthew. I have been recommended this book before and have never got around to reading it, but I find the whole concept of love languages really interesting. I think your point around showing someone love should incorporate their own love language is really important. I definitely think mine is 'Acts of Service' and recognise myself in this within my family role in particular.
I heard about the book years ago and only read it once we went to that lecture by the author. Now, we have several versions around the house. Love is too complex for this to be an all-encompassing solution to understanding it, but it is another set of tools to help us understand one another. All the best Kate!
I feel like I'm a little bit all 5 categories, I can definitely think of times I've felt significantly loved in each of the ways!
If I had to rank, probably:
1. Words of Affirmation / Quality Time
2. Physical Touch / Acts of Service
3. Receiving Gifts
From the right person, the person I most want to love and be loved by in any season of my life, all are welcome!
I tend to find personality quizzes like this most useful for the questions they bring up, rather than looking for any hard answers in them. I enjoyed the examples of how different love languages play out in your household, Matthew, thanks for sharing!
Preety, I agree that all of these have their place dependent on the situation and who is doing the giving. I also think your comment is rather astute, that the best part of these quizzes is the questions they make us ask about ourselves. That is where the real interesting work happens.
Mr Long,as soon as I can I'm going to upgrade but I can't just yet so I apologize. This article was SO MOVING. I appreciate the seven words the Greeks used to differentiate love in different forms. I knew of this but apart from eros and agape I didn't know the other words. I know I have had a lot of love in my life but not the romantic physical sexual kind and as that is the love our society places highest (mainly as you point out because it makes for good stories and visual images so kerching can be monetized,not porn,just romcoms,mills+boon etc)so in some people's eyes (stupid people)they make you feel lesser,the fact you have a lovely home,visit Paris regularly,have read a million books!,can be cancelled out by them by your non-relationship status. Luckily I don't have any of those people around me right now. My two sisters both had + have husbands like you + mutually supportive relationships like yours. My late brother did too in his second marriage. All my life,in two weeks time I'll be 69 (is that real?) I've loved my gardening and I've just started creating a new garden. My previous two now exist only in the photographic record. The Long And Winding Road by Paul MacCartney (not sure what his meaning of it is) but for me it seems to describe how all my life and through all the twists and turns ,gardening is always there,even when I think I'm in a situation where it's going to be impossible,there it is. I encounter God through my gardening,not through romantic love. Maybe I'm the lucky one. (And I've NEVER owned a garden).
Jane, thank you so much for this heartfelt response. I truly appreciate your openness in sharing your own experience and I am grateful my words had an impact on you. I consider these comments on my posts to be "love notes of gratitude" and they make my efforts worthwhile. There is no need to apologize for anything. Your presence here and contribution to the conversation is the best thing I could ask for. Stay tuned for next week's article, I think you might enjoy it as it focuses on how I found a real connection with the natural world. Grateful for you Jane. All the best.
You are welcome! Hope you enjoy.
How interesting! I took the test and, no surprise to me, I’m “Words of Affirmation”. That has been my language since I was a child. My husband took it and his is “Physical Touch”. What’s interesting is that I thought his would be Words of Affirmation. I’m always complimenting him on all tasks he does around the house, his work, his appearance, etc. I seemed to have been under the misconception that this was his love language since it was mine. Now I know! Much more snuggling coming his way lol. Thanks for a very interesting piece this morning, Matthew!
Tami - glad you enjoyed it and glad you guys took the test. It is interesting how we often assume someone else's love language due to our own bias. It made such a difference in my marriage after we figured out how to communicate love to one another in a way that the recipient understood!
Matthew, this was great, and it sparked an engaging conversation between my wife and me. We enjoyed talking about which of the love languages we each appreciate the most. Thanks for this!
Don, thanks for the kind words. This book and topic have been a really great conversation piece for my wife and me as well over the years. It has helped us both during some challenging moments when it seemed like communication wasn't going well and then we realized that one or both of us were off on a tangent somewhere!
I think I'll pick up a copy. :-)
Thanks so much for mentioning my publication in a post titled by ZNH! ❤️ I also love the coffee analogy and may share this with my husband with hopes of 5 kinds of coffee this week - literally.
Interesting and timely reflections here. Always enjoy your work, Matthew.
I sincerely appreciate the kind words. My wife isn't a coffee drinker, so I am not sure this will resonate quite the same with her, but one can always hope!
Thank you for sharing this, Matthew. I have been recommended this book before and have never got around to reading it, but I find the whole concept of love languages really interesting. I think your point around showing someone love should incorporate their own love language is really important. I definitely think mine is 'Acts of Service' and recognise myself in this within my family role in particular.
I heard about the book years ago and only read it once we went to that lecture by the author. Now, we have several versions around the house. Love is too complex for this to be an all-encompassing solution to understanding it, but it is another set of tools to help us understand one another. All the best Kate!
Touching, and super-interesting.
Thanks Barrie!
I’m looking forward to taking the test. Thanks for sharing!
My pleasure!
That coffee image is very helpful!
A few weeks ago, my wife and I acknowledged one another's love languages. This article appeared as a magnet towards action for me.
My take-aways:
1) Love is a much better verb than a noun.
2) I'm not "in love", I act in alignment with love.
Yeah, I found that image to be an insightful and easy way to communicate what is often a complicated topic. Love your take-aways as well. So true.
I feel like I'm a little bit all 5 categories, I can definitely think of times I've felt significantly loved in each of the ways!
If I had to rank, probably:
1. Words of Affirmation / Quality Time
2. Physical Touch / Acts of Service
3. Receiving Gifts
From the right person, the person I most want to love and be loved by in any season of my life, all are welcome!
I tend to find personality quizzes like this most useful for the questions they bring up, rather than looking for any hard answers in them. I enjoyed the examples of how different love languages play out in your household, Matthew, thanks for sharing!
Preety, I agree that all of these have their place dependent on the situation and who is doing the giving. I also think your comment is rather astute, that the best part of these quizzes is the questions they make us ask about ourselves. That is where the real interesting work happens.
Mr Long,as soon as I can I'm going to upgrade but I can't just yet so I apologize. This article was SO MOVING. I appreciate the seven words the Greeks used to differentiate love in different forms. I knew of this but apart from eros and agape I didn't know the other words. I know I have had a lot of love in my life but not the romantic physical sexual kind and as that is the love our society places highest (mainly as you point out because it makes for good stories and visual images so kerching can be monetized,not porn,just romcoms,mills+boon etc)so in some people's eyes (stupid people)they make you feel lesser,the fact you have a lovely home,visit Paris regularly,have read a million books!,can be cancelled out by them by your non-relationship status. Luckily I don't have any of those people around me right now. My two sisters both had + have husbands like you + mutually supportive relationships like yours. My late brother did too in his second marriage. All my life,in two weeks time I'll be 69 (is that real?) I've loved my gardening and I've just started creating a new garden. My previous two now exist only in the photographic record. The Long And Winding Road by Paul MacCartney (not sure what his meaning of it is) but for me it seems to describe how all my life and through all the twists and turns ,gardening is always there,even when I think I'm in a situation where it's going to be impossible,there it is. I encounter God through my gardening,not through romantic love. Maybe I'm the lucky one. (And I've NEVER owned a garden).
Jane, thank you so much for this heartfelt response. I truly appreciate your openness in sharing your own experience and I am grateful my words had an impact on you. I consider these comments on my posts to be "love notes of gratitude" and they make my efforts worthwhile. There is no need to apologize for anything. Your presence here and contribution to the conversation is the best thing I could ask for. Stay tuned for next week's article, I think you might enjoy it as it focuses on how I found a real connection with the natural world. Grateful for you Jane. All the best.
Thanks Mathew long for the beautiful message, it is definitely about giving that gratifies our soul. Sharing my best read here too.